Blanket's Creek

It's been a long time since I've ridden my mountain bike, but today I was struck by how my mind goes into a very quiet place when I ride. Thoughts come and go, but the flow of the trail and of my attention to each tiny adjustment of my body and my bike, keeps me in a place that is very like a meditation the entire time. I rode for an hour and a half at Blanket's Creek trails, rode every inch of trail, and I hardly ever felt the need to come up for air. Things came into my mind, asked for my attention, and I let them go with the very next breath, the next rotation of the pedals, the next banked turn. The focus of my mind and body was so pleasant, the air so cool, the light so clear filtering through the leaves, I never wanted it to end. They've made some really nice improvements to the trail out there, built up the banks on the switchbacks on the VanMichaels loop so that you can scream around them like a BMX track. It's like a playground for big kids. So grateful for Fun!

Did You Hear Thunder?

"⁷ My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me." John 10:27

I believe that we always hear the voice of God; often we ignore what we hear; sometimes we think we hear just the noise of our own thoughts,  and it doesn't make any sense to us, but He is always there, in us, faithfully speaking truth, imparting Life.

The goal of this journey I walk with people is not to fix them, it is to lead them into intimacy with Jesus. A beautiful side effect of learning to listen for his voice speaking in our hearts is that our day to day thoughts and feelings are radically changed, and so our behavior is changed as well.

When we bump into Jesus, we can’t help being changed by him. His presence, his personality, his grace, his lovingkindness, his words of reassurance, comfort and delight over us: all these are incredibly powerful if we will let go of ourselves and experience him for a moment. Each facet of who he is transforms our hearts.

When he walked the earth in flesh and blood as a man, people followed Jesus out of sheer delight. He is a pure joy to be around. Even though he was always saying impossible things like “Be Ye perfect as God is perfect”, or extreme things like, “sell all you have, give it to the poor, and come follow me”, people still wanted to be around him all the time. He is always trying to wake us up to our true poverty and invite us to come receive from him. I’m sure people back then didn’t understand, and we don't either, but that doesn’t matter, we want this LIFE he is offering.

 Whenever people give him even the briefest of chances to speak into their hearts, we find joy bubbling up, joy even to tears, and release of emotions, and false beliefs that may have been festering for years.

Take this woman I recently met with. We have been meeting for about 9 months now, and I have seen incredible changes in her heart and mind, and in her demeanor, and it has all happened because she learned (I’d like to say I taught her, but I didn’t really) that Jesus speaks in her heart, every day, every moment, and she can be with him in her thoughts any time she wants to. Although her story is a very tough one, full of betrayal, abandonment and lies, she has learned to look at it all differently because of God's interpretation of her life.

As we sat down for a mentoring session the other day, I pulled out a Taylor Johnson personality test she took 9 months ago, and another one that she just took a week or so ago. This test is a self-report designed to show what is going on inside a person’s emotions on a deep level, sometimes even deeper than they themselves are aware. It can be quite revealing. On several key markers she has seen incredible transformation, so I thought it was time to celebrate together. Her levels of depression and anxiety, since learning to listen to Jesus, have gone from very high, to quite normal and healthy levels  Her level of emotional expressiveness has gone from extremely inhibited to much more expressive and responsive. One of the most significant markers, subjectivity (which measures the tendency to be caught up in emotion and self-absorbed) has come way down as she learns to see things from the far broader and more balanced perspective of Jesus. Finally, after walking through forgiveness, we have seen her level of hostility drop as she becomes much more tolerant and understanding of herself and others. Her view of herself is far more positive as well; she is learning to rest in the grace of God and not in her own performance. None of the circumstances of her life have changed, but her inner world has been changed by simply spending time listening and enjoying the presence of Jesus.

Now, I’m not saying that measurements like this test are the way God looks at us, or the way He wants us to look at ourselves, but it can be very encouraging to be able to see the change in the way a person feels, thinks and acts put down in paper on a graph! There is a metric of celebration present here, yet the transformation that Jesus has worked is beyond any measurement or chart. It is a change in the spirit that is ineluctably working its way out into our daily lives. Learning to tune into what He is doing, as this woman has done, is simply a wonderful catalyst to witnessing the change as it happens.

I see changes like this in people every day, even in the course of just an hour of talking, or a few minutes of prayer time with Jesus.

Before Jesus went to the cross, He stood before a crowd and asked the Father to glorify His name. The Father replied, presumably in a voice audible to all who stood by “I have glorified it, and will glorify it again.” But the crowd that was there and heard it said it had thundered; others said an angel had spoken to him.

The same is true for all of us. We may be tempted to write off the miracle of Jesus speaking into our hearts as nothing but our own thoughts. Someone standing by might say something that amounts to the dismissal of “did you hear thunder?” But together with Jesus, you and I have a chance to witness and celebrate the miracle. Because we're with Jesus in this process, we can hear the voice of the Father saying to each of us “This is my beloved, on whom my favor rests” and so much more . . . as He reveals His amazing love to us.

I praise God for your participation in the message of the good news with me.

Charles

The first cold morning of fall: A Sunday Morning Bicycle Ride

Sope Creek from the Bridge

first light 55deg.
Paper Mill Loop 25miles.

The long descent on Murdoch rd
the sun glancing into my eyes through the trees,
across the stream and around
the most delightfully banked curve
rolling past the meadow where
a flock of geese wander
and two foals nibble the dewy grass.

Bishop's lake Rd is newly paved
so the rollers are a smooth black ribbon
stretched out across the dells and hollows
where mists rise and dance across the water
toward the sky in whisps caught by the morning light blinding me each time I turn my head to look,
too bright to enjoy, to beautiful to ignore.

Climbing the hill due east toward the catholic church
I ride directly into the rising sun,
the field of my vision fully obscured
by the blinding light
and I shiver to know the cars behind
cannot see my form
standing on the pedals
to propel me up the hill,
their windshields like my glasses
a complete whiteout.

Little Willeo dips and rolls and finally
climbs up the long hill to Johnsons Ferry Rd.
On an empty stretch of Woodlawn
I sit up for the first time
pedaling with no hands, like a kid again,
and eat a granola bar
out of my jersey pocket.

On the descent of Paper Mill toward sope creek
I scream in delight as I feel the bike accelerate
up over 40 mph
and then the electric shock of adrenaline
pulses through every cell of my body
on the sharp curve where I think for just a moment
"I could go down, this pavement could be wet with the dew"
but I cannot brake now already committed to the line I've chosen,
knowing the brakes will only send me careening
into or over the guard rail and the creek below.

But then the thought is reigned in
as I bring my mind back to the breath
and the body resumes it's gentle rhythmic pulse.

A brief pause on the bridge above the rocks
and then the labor of the long climb up out of the ravine.
Now I'm feeling the pain in my legs.
It's a short ride this morning but already
I'm tempted by demoralizing thoughts,
slower than usual, feeling old, just going
to get slower as the years go on,
but no, return to the breath,
enjoy this moment now, live it to the full
whether you are going full out
or holding back because you're just not there today.

Still, finish as strong as you can on the climb up Holly Springs,
not a very long ride, but still a good one, a kind of rolling meditation
that gave my mind and body a break from the mundane
making the rest of the day a little more magical
in the glow of chemicals my body happily produces
as it rebuilds muscle fibers.

My wife and children's faces look a little sweeter
after this time, the warm house inviting in the morning light
the smell of coffee brewing welcomes me in.

The Flow of Life

 

He who believes in Me, as the Scripture said, 'From his innermost being will flow rivers of living water.' John 7:38

The flow of the Holy Spirit is the Love of God poured out in us (Romans 5:5), for us, and through us. This has been my focus over the past years of family life and ministry.  

Knowing Jesus face to face 2 Cor. 3:18, in each moment of my life, this is the joyful privilege and practice I teach to those I lead in Him.  

Together we are aware of the deceptions and bankruptcy of the flesh and it's formulas for success, but we will not be distracted or displaced from our awareness of the Love of God fully revealed to us in Jesus.

It is the Spirit who gives life; the flesh profits nothing; the words that I have spoken to you are spirit and are life. John 6:63

Stop for a moment to feel yourself breathing, and listen to the words He has spoken in your heart, words of peace (John 14:26) words of life. Take the time to experience your own breathing as you rest in Jesus. Are you becoming aware that each breath is a gift of life from God to you? In His eyes we are "those who breathe because I give my gift of Life to them".  

The mind set on the flesh is death, but the mind set on the spirit is life and peace. Romans 8:6.  

Awaken to the life and peace that well up in your mind, that flow, as you allow yourself to feel gratitude for the gift of
life, of your next breath. You are being breathed by God Himself. In Him we live and move and have our being. In us He lives and moves and has His being. What a beautiful partnership, what an amazing dance.

Jesus breathed on them and said, receive the Holy Spirit.

Release yourself into the flow of God's Spirit through you. This breath is life to your body, this spirit is living water to your soul, this awareness is clarity and truth for your mind.

His Spirit testifies with our spirit that we are children of God. Romans 8:16

By the waters of reflection my soul remembers who I am. Ps. 23:2-3

Who are you? You belong to God in Jesus. His life is your life now. You are fully identified in Him. Let your focus be the experience and expression of His Love.

Accept the challenge of abiding in Him moment by moment, resting in the awareness of His Presence as you live your life, pursue your dreams, do your work, love your friends and serve your family.

In Jesus you experience all the tenderness of God towards you, and from His life you may share that tenderness with all.

Receive the feedback that His word in your heart constantly provides. "You are my beloved child, in whom I am well pleased." His voice is your source of life and peace.

Allow His delight in you to guide you through your moments. Rejoice in the unending favor of His love.

yours,

Charles

Guest Post: Denise Yaun

 

The following is a writing from Denise's pen when she simply allowed herself to listen to what Jesus was saying to her heart. It is part of an exercise that we participated in as part of our last Thursday Night Live meeting. The meditation begins with the words "Lord I know that you love me, and that you speak to me out of your love . . ." and the voice is Jesus.

His Flow In Me

I flow in your thoughts, your mind, your world, around and around you celebrating my love for you. 

I flow in your writing, baking, gardening, talking, breathing, living. 

I flow in your anger, misunderstanding, softly serenading your wounded heart. 

I flow in my rejoicing that you are mine and I am yours. 

I flow in your quietness, the stillness of morning as you sit on your sofa writing to me. 

I flow in your comings and goings, trips to the store, errands to run. 

You may lose sight of me  on your mission to do as much as you can, but it is my flow that slows you down, tires you, causes you to sit down and rest, questioning me why your energy is depleted. 

I flow when you feel stuck, dissatisfied, annoyed with the circumstances of life. 

My flow carries you forward when you feel like you’ve taken two steps back. 

My flow radiates, permeates your entire being. 

My flow keeps you with me.

Denise Yaun

08/30/12

Sacred Flow

Come join us Thursday August 30 from 6:30-9:30pm as we continue a conversation about flow. Think about the areas of life where you experience deep concentration and focused attention, and those areas where you feel distracted and out of it. God is interested in being a part of every aspect of our lives. He teaches us the value of focus, challenge and feedback as we learn to flow from His life in us.

"Sacred flow realizes a life in which we learn to live, move, and simply be absorbed in the rhythm and flow of God's Spirit. Putting rhythm and flow together in light of everyday Christian spirituality, rhythm describes our life's general everyday movement, while flow occurs when we dive into life's more challenging activities or circumstances. We experience rhythm with God when we attune to his love while engaging in commonplace activities like lazy strolls, hanging out with family, eating dinner, texting a friend, brushing our teeth, checking email, walking the dog, vegging out, driving to work, sleeping, playing with our kids, etc. We find genuine enjoyment in these activities when we give them our full attention, rather than treating them like mundane activities or menacing duties. They seamlessly become part of our rhythm with God.

Flow is movement in the midst of more intense activity or challenge like busy days at the office, intense days at play, demanding service projects, challenging hobbies, fitness training, competing in a competition, deep conversation, etc.

In sacred flow, ebb and flow becomes rhythm and flow as we, cognizant of God's love, engage in less demanding and more demanding activities, dive in and pull back, speed up and slow down."

excerpt from Sacred Flow: Discovering Life in the Divine Current by Artie Sposaro

The Bourne Identity

and

The Jesus Identity

(a journal entry written in 2007)

Over the past few months I have seen a series of movies based on the Jason Bourne books. This man, by his own choice, was stripped of his identity, of his memory, of his old self ,and trained to be a ruthless killer, ruthlessly obedient to an organization, a government, a cause.

Now he wants to go back. He doesn’t want to be a killer any more, he wants to escape his new identity and remember who he was before he was brainwashed into being Jason Bourne. He does not want to kill, and yet it is what he does automatically, instinctively, seemingly without thought or intention, because this is what he has been trained to do. And now he must fight his way back to a place where he can unlearn who he has been made to be.

Is there not something here that I must learn from Jesus?

I had an old IN Adam identity. But it was never my true intended identity. I was made in the image of God, and so my real name, and my true nature, only He knows. I know now that I must go to Him to find it out.

But I too, like Jason Bourne, have found myself awake and alive in a false identity that IS NOT ME. I will call it the flesh, since it is not me, and yet I seem as hopelessly linked to it as I am to my own body. I cannot seem to remember who I was made to be. I know that it is not this flesh, but I have not yet discovered, or remembered, WHO I really AM.

Along comes Jesus, and He offers me His cross. This cross is the place, He says, where you go free from the old identity: the brainwashed self. This is the place where the ruthless killer goes to die. In Jesus, on His cross, my flesh is dealt with through crucifixion, and in His resurrection I am raised and I am given that New Identity that I was always intended to have, my Child of God self. (John 1:12-13)

The identity that was forced on me at birth, in Adam, was a son of disobedience, a child of wrath, (Eph. 2:1-3) and yet as I grew up into this world system, I chose to live out of this identity. I chose to be brainwashed in Adam. It was all that I knew, because it was what I was trained to do. Even though I received Jesus into my heart at only 6 years old and was granted a death of my old self, and resurrection life in a new identity, I still learned to play by this worlds’ rules, to survive as best I knew how, without enjoying or accessing the life of Christ I already had in me.

In my first six years, I learned to operate out of the fleshly identity, to move effortlessly through life wounding those around me as I went, for my own protection and benefit. Just as Jason Bourne would, without a thought, break a policeman’s arm and render him unconscious to subdue him to his purpose and his will, I too, in Adam, learned to wound and parry and defend myself from rejection and hurt directed at me by those in Adam around me. Like him, I was desperate to survive, and so I did what I had to do: a ruthless killer in the flesh.

Even after age six when I received a new identity in Jesus, I did not know that I had everything I needed inside me already: a spiritual Source of healing and life and protection and strength that makes all my fleshly efforts to protect myself and meet my needs irrelevant. Even though I was a Child of God now, with a new identity in Jesus, I acted out the part I had been trained to play by the world, the flesh and the devil. I guess that “spirit that was at work in the sons of disobedience”(eph. 2:1) trained me too well in those first six years before I came to know Jesus, and I kept following the initial training program, like Jason Bourne. I kept on walking after the flesh, protecting myself to meet my own needs, and expending myself in effort after effort on an endless quest to discover who I was, to gain significance, worth, an identity. Like Jason Bourne, I did not like it one bit, and so I understood that bitter smirk of desperation and determination he wore on his face through every movie.

But now, after allowing me 30 plus years of walking in that old identity, of plan after plan laid down to finally prove who I was and get to the bottom of this mystery of life, Jesus has finally awakened me to my new identity in Him, and I find that it is a GIFT, not a plan, not an accomplishment of mine, not even a martial arts self defense move. I have been this new person, yet I did not know it. I have, from the day of my salvation, always had this Child of God spirit living in me, joined to His Spirit, but I did not know it.

I wanted to know it, but my old programming in the flesh told me that it was impossible, too good to be true, a pipe dream (it still does tell me this). “God can’t be that good, He’s not that generous. He must be like the people that you have known, demanding, incredibly high expectations, and no help for it. The world doesn’t operate on Grace (a gift system), it operates on the law of my behavior. If I can get it right, then everything will be allright. If I can’t, then . . . all hell breaks loose.” And the vicious world around me still whispers that “life is hard, and you have to try hard or you’ll be destroyed. You have to live like Jason Bourne, in a desperate plight, always running, always protecting yourself, always scheming.”

But God has revealed something different to my heart, through His Word, and his words whispered gently into my innermost being.

“It is the Spirit who GIVES life; the flesh profits nothing; the words that I have spoken to you are Spirit and they are life.” John 6:63

Can this be true? Ask yourself. Is Real Life, life as God lives it (ZOE)  a gift and not the result of my own effort?

I used to think that God would never show me what He had in mind when He created me.

"No eye has seen,

      no ear has heard,

   no mind has conceived

   what God has prepared for those who love him" 1 cor. 2:9

I wondered if I could ever love Him enough, and I thought I had to be content with this mystery of never knowing.

But then a friend told me to read the next verse. “10 but God has revealed it to us by his Spirit.

      The Spirit searches all things, even the deep things of God.”

Now I believe that He has already revealed everything that I need to know, in my heart, in my Spirit, and that He will unfold it to me as I need to know. He will reveal my new identity, and yours, as we go “for we have the mind of Christ.”

Perhaps the first thing He reveals is that my love can never be enough, because it can only be a response to Him, who IS LOVE. (1 John 4:10)

It is good to know that I am not like Jason Bourne anymore. I’m not a man, living alone and uncertain of who I am, constantly haunted  by memories of what I have done and dogged by assassins who would kill me to fulfill their purposes. I am now the Beloved of God. I have received complete forgiveness for all that I have ever done, or will ever do. I no longer have to live in guilt. I am free. I no longer have to react out of my old training. It is no longer kill or be killed for me. I know who I am, and I’m receiving new insight, and new orders to obey from a Lord who loves me deeply and not only has my ear (those little ear buds are a dead give away aren’t they?) but has my heart in his hands. (Ezek 36:26ff).

In fact, according to God, I now have a totally new identity in HIS SON. I have the Jesus Identity. I am His and He is mine.  I have become a member of his body, able to work perfectly as He directs. moving flawlessly, effortlessly as His very life expressed in this world. I thank God that I can discover that my role is not kill or be killed, but love my enemies and bless those who persecute me. Though to the flesh this seems impossible, with my new Identity, it is the only natural thing to do. Now He is my righteousness, my wisdom, and my redemption. (1 Cor:1:30) and so, like Paul, I can say that I’m “a special agent for God, in Christ Jesus.” (eph. 1:1 Message) Unlike Jason Bourne, I’m not trapped in the web of a hopelessly corrupt government program called Treadstone, I’m part of a special task force that God has appointed to make the life of His Son known in this world, and I rejoice in following the impulse of His Love in me

14For the love of Christ controls us, having concluded this, that one died for all, therefore all died;15and He died for all, so that they who live might no longer live for themselves, but for Him who died and rose again on their behalf. 16Therefore from now on we recognize no one according to the flesh; even though we have known Christ according to the flesh, yet now we know Him in this way no longer 17Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come.18Now all these things are from God, who reconciled us to Himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation,19namely, that God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and He has committed to us the word of reconciliation. 20Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God were making an appeal through us; we beg you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God.  21He made Him who knew no sin to be sin on our behalf, so that we might become the righteousness of God in Him. (2 Cor 5:14-21).

Did you know that you died with Jesus on the cross? I believe that this is what Paul is saying here about your identity as a believer. Do you know that your death made possible the coming of a new resurrected life in you? So, do you regard yourself or your fellow believers according to the flesh any longer? I hope not. Rejoice with me, for if you have received Jesus and all that He has done for you, you are a new creation. You have a new Identity, and I do to. Because He became sin (v.21) we have become the Righteousness of God in Him. If you don’t believe that, then you don’t believe that God did what He said He did on the Cross, and you’ll just have to go on trying to live out the Bourne Identity in Adam. I’m done with that though, because even though it can seem exciting for a while to be always on the run, always trying hard to make it work, it wears you out, and in the end it hurts too much. God is calling us to something so much better, a life filled with joy. I’m ready to live this Jesus Identity. I hope that you are too.

Wednesday nov. 14. 07